keep on, keepin' on

oh man. i don't know how i have gotten so far removed from blogging, but i can't even remember the last time i posted. its become a nearly daunting task, like when you think of an old friend frequently and know you should call, but its been so long you're almost "afraid" to pick up the phone. in my mind, i blog every night, noting the little things that happen during the day!

today is monday june 18th and by this time in one week, there will be three of you. i have been hesitant to post much about it, but since things are all firmed up now, i feel like the coast is clear. at my 20 week ultrasound they discovered a placenta previa, which basically means the placenta is underneath baby butterscotch. the risk factor involved with that is that if i were to go into labor on my own, i would potentially deliver it first, there by removing the baby's life line. no oxygen, blood or baby support system. the other risk is that i could basically bleed to death! either way, no fun, not safe for either one of us. they were hoping that over the course of a few months, this would rectify itself. it hasn't. now we are having a scheduled c-section three weeks early. i know that people have sections all of the time, but i can't help but be a little nervous and disappointed in all of this news. now we go from having a birth, to having a scheduled surgery. i am not looking forward to having a wound, not being able to pick up my other little people and the restrictions that are coming along with this development. alas, its the safest thing for everyone involved so i am just trying to accept that its out of my hands.

i am getting very excited to meet this little person who has brought so many surprises the last 9 months! and thank God its coming three weeks early because i am so over being pregnant. i have officially gained more weight with this baby than combined the first two! seriously. im waddling something fierce and can't get comfortable most of the day. not to mention that the heat index has been nearly 120 around here lately. fat, pregnant girl + heat = not good! we have been hibernating indoors the majority of the day and don't come out until evenings. then we go directly to the pool and swim for a few hours, having  developed a fun little routine of swimming and ending the night with popsicles. vivian can't manage to get the word "popsicle" out so she just requests bomb pops most nights. i think she is on to us that something is about to change, she has become a real momma's girl and clings to me most of the day. its bittersweet in that its nice she likes me but a real pain that she won't go to anyone else. her days as the baby are numbered!

we brought the bassinet and changing table into our room and vivian put all her dolls and blankets into the bed. i think i am going to keep a very close eye on her and the baby! she might become quite the little helper. jack on the other hand, seems to be very excited for the birth of his new sibling. most days he says butterscotch is a girl and there seems to be a genuine level of excitement with him. i think he, too, is ready for me to not be pregnant anymore since i am constantly uncomfortable and lounge around a lot. getting down on the ground to side walk chalk is next to impossible! i am so grateful we can still swim so i am not a complete dud of a mother. i am hopeful neither of them will remember how lethargic and useless i am right now.

this pregnancy i have been really into seltzer water with lots of fresh squeezed lime, lavender essential oils and ice cream. i've had no real cravings, though i would certainly be killing the tomatoes in the back yard if they would ever ripen. i probably have 100 green tomatoes out there and have only had ONE red one all summer. i got a little over ambitious with the plantings this summer but thought if i was going to grow things, i might as well really GROW things. they will probably all turn next week when i am in the hospital. . .

jack and vivian are in the middle of a growth spurt, we had to go and buy everyone new tennis shoes today. we love new shoes around here. vivian is speaking in compete sentences and the terrible twos are rapidly approaching. just today randy noted that she was probably going to spend a lot of time in time out! she now yells "i want it," "NOW!" and "NO!" its not so charming. she is virtually potty trained thanks to determination on my part and lots of m & m rewards. it will be so nice to not have to buy quite as many diapers!

jack is ready for preschool to start next month and is becoming a real big boy! he took swimming lessons this summer and can now "swim" with a life jacket on. its more floating with style, but he is getting the jest of it. he learned last week that he cannot, in fact, "swim" on his own and without the jacket; but it has provided him some freedom and i don't have to stay right on top of two children while we are in the pool.  they both really love to go potty outside when we are at the pool- a nifty little trick your dad started letting you do. vivian is very confused that she doesn't have a penis, nothing to hold on to when she goes potty. she reaches around and looks between her legs, desperate to produce a stream with the same magnitude jack does. he got a little "cocky" with his stream the other night and was bragging to grandpa, "watch this!" making it go up and down. while he was in the middle of boasting and not pay attention, he managed to piss right in his own face, mouth included! grandpa was laughing so hard, i thought for certain HE too was going to wet his own pants. ah, boys.

other than that, i have nothing profound to note! this is probably a really disappointing posting. we have just been keep on, keepin' on and trying to make it until things resume to our version of normal. i'm not so sure i am ready to have a newborn baby and two other children under the age of 4 but i am, indeed, so ready to no longer be pregnant. i can practically taste the sushi and martinis already! hopefully i will manage to slide one or two more posts into this week but there is a good chance the next post will be about your new sibling!

let the games begin!