so thankful

it's a couple of days after thanksgiving and i have spent the better part of these last few days in bed. it is a lovely thing to have the three of you in my life but let's face it, you are carrier monkeys, bringing home whatever germ or contagion you come across. this one started with vivian two weeks ago, spread to jack last week, then the poor baby and by wednesday of this week i was starting to feel its effects. the bitch of all of this is that right about the time you all are feeling good again, regaining your energy, momma is zapped. i have spent countless nights up taking some ones temperature, dosing out tylenol, rocking, checking humidifiers and worrying. now you are all bouncing off the walls with your new found zest and health and i am miserable. i am, however, thankful this has fallen during daddy's thanksgiving break and he has been taking the day shift while i struggle through the night. baby eleanor also happens to be going through a growth spurt and is waking up every three hours to nurse, which couldn't be any less perfectly timed.

such is my life and although i am feeling under the weather and melancholy about it all, i am very thankful for this life. and to keep in the spirit i thought i would make you all a little list of the things i am thankful for today, november 26, 2011.

i am thankful for. . .

• your father. he's a boy, so by nature, he is a little gross at times, but i am pretty sure i've got the best guy out there. he let's me sleep in, takes care of the three of you and ENJOYS it, he does laundry, he loves all of us. he is an amazing provider and above all, your dad makes me laugh every single day. our feuds are few and far between, fortunately, and when they do happen its usually over something ridiculously silly. he would do anything for us and that is evident to everyone. i was blessed to have the three of you, but never have i been so lucky as the day that i found him. 
• my parents. i hope, when the time comes, and you are adults that you will like me as much as i like my parents. don't get me wrong, its been a long road to get here and there were certainly times i thought they were out to get me, but now that i have you all, i know they have always had my best interest at heart. they spent the month of october with us and we had a ball. its an amazing gift to come to the place where you see your parents as real people. i now know so much more about them, their hopes, their dreams, their pasts and its shed some light on who they are. they love the three of you so much! they drove all the way from springfield the weekend of moving just to see you for 24 hours! can you believe that!? and mom cried today when she left and vivian said to her in the sweetest voice, "i will miss you, grandma." and we do, already.
• my brother. i know i have talked about it before in this blog, but i can't think of a bigger gift my parents could have given me than my ornery little brother. he's been helping me out and taking jack to swimming lessons, its "guy time" and jack really loves it. lately, uncle tim has you all convinced he works for willy wonka making chocolate every day. i am worried for the day that bubble is burst! 
• i am thankful to live in a country with so many freedoms and so many people willing to protect that freedom. the land of the free and the home of the brave, it really doesn't get much better than that.
• i am thankful for a kind and loving God that forgives me, shapes me and encourages me to do better, to be better. 
• i am thankful for being blessed with so many amazing friends! there have been times in my life that friends have come and gone but in this moment in time, the stars are aligned and i have the coolest, most thoughtful and wonderful friends. i am thankful for one very special renewed friendship in particular this year with the good dr kinder. after all this time, she is still the quirky, hilarious, silly girl i met so many years ago. i am also thankful, that i have had the wisdom to know when to walk away from friendships that were no longer working. (let that be another lesson, "you've got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away, and know when to run!") 
• i am thankful for my mini van. damn it. i never thought i would say those words but it sure makes life with three car seats easier!
• i am thankful for my sweet, sweet dog, neko, despite the deafening snoring. 
• i am thankful for two amazing bosses, that i am lucky enough to call my friends. 
• i am thankful for a roof over our head, electricity in this house and that despite how pissed your dad gets about the pool, he hasn't turned it into a basketball court. . . yet! 
• i am so, so thankful for my bathtub.
• i am thankful for gel manicures, hair color, sweat pants, great fitting jeans, a massive musical library, my iphone, this computer, girls night out, family night in, halloween, dressing up, car payment shoes, family heirloom jewelry, marble counter tops, my mom's sugar cookies, ashland avenue, finally a decent drivers license picture, an amazing babysitter, a job that allows me to be creative, great wines, good food, that my hair is finally growing back in post-baby, a dreadmill that works, bearcat victories, our dinner club, this community, my godmother and my children's godmother and so many other things, i could list all night long.
• i am especially thankful that this old body, once consider infertile was able to sustain three pregnancies. i will never forget the disappointment before we were able to get pregnant with jack the first time and the joy that came when we found out we were finally having a baby! and then with miss vivian, how my chances weren't good, there was one lone egg and it didn't look like it would be big enough to fertilize. imagine our surprise when it did fertilize and there were TWO babies! i was sad for a second about the loss of the other one, but vivian's star was just too bright to share the light with anyone else! and sweet baby eleanor! someday this statement will gross you out, but it was on this very night one year ago you came into existence. we thought it was physically impossible to get pregnant on our own and although a third child had crossed our mind, we weren't planning for it. i can honestly say, i have NEVER been so surprised in my life as they day i found out you were coming! you have been the single best surprise of my life and have really completed our family. 

i have so very many things to be thankful and grateful for. i honestly count my blessings every day and pinch myself that of all the people God could have picked, He chose me to have this life. i appreciate it so much and am thankful every day. 

Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough.
-- Oprah Winfrey